Betcha Thought I'd Never Post Again, Dinch' Ya'?

So, I'm officially two now. Actually, I've been officially two for around a couple months. I've been getting bigger and bigger, and more and more vocal. In fact, most of the time, you'll find me singing and dancing to some tune or another. I can sort of sing my ABC's now, and if you sing along, I'll say most of the letters. I'm a big fan of "The Wiggles", an Australian band that has lots of cool songs for kids like me. My favorite songs are "Fruit Salad" and "The Monkey Dance"! I also like Barney singing "I love you", and will sing along to that too. Most of the time, I amuse myself by playing with my dolls and reading books. I love to read books, especially "Blue's Clues" books, because they have pictures of "Joe" (The host of the show). I love Joe, and constantly carry pictures of him that I have ripped out of Nickelodeon magazine. The pages keep wearing out and ripping, and Mommy and Daddy use tape to fix them. From time to time, they have to buy more magazines to replace them!

As of a few weeks ago, I officially entered the "Terrible Twos" and have become quite professional at throwing tantrums any time I don't get my way. Mommy and Daddy seem to be having a hard time accepting that I'm the one in charge. I can throw a tantrum for up to 30 minutes, and trust me when I say they can't be easily ignored! For the past few months, I've refused to sleep in my room. I will only sleep on the living room floor. Don't ask me why that is, because I'm two...and nothing I do makes sense right now. Poor Mommy has to sleep downstairs on the floor with me, because I wake up regularly throughout the night. I know. You are saying to yourself, "Why don't they just move her into her bedroom when she's asleep?" They have done this. But I'll wake up either in transit or within a few minutes of being in my room and will scream like a banshee. Then I'll run back downstairs and lay down on the floor of the living room again. Aren't I a stinker?

So, what's new with you? (Shh! Here's a secret - I don't care!) You see, at my age, I'm all about me...and honestly, with my curly hair and beer belly body, why on Earth would I be interested in anybody else? In fact, I remind myself a lot of Paris Hilton. Everything in the world belongs to me. People fight to take pictures of me. Boys follow me around like lost puppies. (In fact, lost puppies follow me around too. ) Once I'm done with anything, I just toss it on the ground and leave it for someone else to pick up. I have more clothes than both of my parents combined....and most importantly, at any given moment of any given day, I'm secretly videotaped without my knowledge. Especially during embarrassing moments, like me licking the picture of Joe or Steve from Blue's Clues. (You see, I kiss by licking - cause my little doggie taught me how to do it.) Or singing songs while I'm in the bath...Or when I walk around naked! Now, don't get the wrong idea. The naked stuff isn't exactly titillating - unless of course, you are some hot 9 month old boy. (I go for the younger boys.) I just hate wearing clothes and I especially hate wearing diapers. Usually I allow it, but from time to time, it's a horrible battle until Mommy gives in and gives me 5 minutes of "freedom". The reason it only lasts 5 minutes, is because that's about as much time as it takes for me to pee all over the carpet or the couch or my chair. I bet that's something Paris would never do!...Well, maybe she does...

I'm having fun in daycare, and have decided that my teacher, Ms. Alyssa belongs solely to me. If any other children go near her, I throw a fit - push them away, and attach myself using my limbs of steel to her leg, lap or chest. I'm a WWF girl (World Wrestling Federation), and trust me when I say that it takes more than one person to unwrap me from my prey once I've taken hold.

All in all, my cuteness never fades - but grows brighter every day. Whether I'm dancing or singing or throwing myself onto the floor, it's a pleasure to be me. That being said...here are my most recent paparazzi shots:




















Here was my beautiful birthday cake. That's all you are going to see from my birthday party, as I was throwing a giant fit. Just know there were a lot of people there, and I was having fun, but I wasn't about to stop the fun just to look at a cake. Besides, by turning two, I'm one step closer to 40...and you five-year olds know what I mean.

























I love to wear hats. I have a Mexican sombrero that's my favorite. I also like baseball caps, but when a hat isn't handy, a smart girl learns to improvise. I also like purses, and will walk around with my arm cocked so that I gracefully carry the purse wherever I go. In this picture, you can see me praying that Prada comes out with a line of Barbie purses.




















Here I am practicing for my Sports Illustrated photo shoot. Don't mind the blue stuff around my mouth. It's the leftover result of a nice blue lollipop. The hand belongs to my brother, and you can tell by how I'm looking at it, that I am getting ready to attack. ARRR! I'm a tiger!




















Baby, I'm a star! Pay no attention to the fact that the sunglasses are upside down, as I prefer them that way. Notice that I've accesorized* my outfit with a lovely pink scarf and a matching binky. (*Yes, I know I mispelled the word, but I'm two-years old for God's sake! Give me a break here!)




















Here I am in my unofficial "bedroom", pretending to go nite-nite. My brother is pretending with me. We are really good actors and deserve Oscars. No. Really. I deserve an Oscar. GIVE IT TO ME NOW!




















See? I told you we were pretending. Also, note that I've color coordinated my binky again. For those of you who think that's an easy task, you can just smell my diaper! I've also noticed that the cutest pictures of dogs are ones in which the dog tilts her head. I decided to try that as well. Did it work?...Of course it did, you silly silly reader!




















So, for about a 3 month period ( I think I told you about this before) I walked around with my hand in my diaper continuously. This resulted in me pulling out fudge every single time I made it. I would then wipe it on any surface I found nearby. Remember when I told you about embarrasing pictures and video? Well, the paparazzi caught me here. But despite the way it looks, I wasn't pulling anything OUT of my diaper. I was using it as a storage chamber and was putting stuff IN it. I've outgrown it now, but for a long time, when someone changed my diaper, they would find small toys, figurines, straws and food that I'd stuffed in there for safe keeping. I mean, what better place could you hide something? It's not like someone's about to fish in there to try and get it!




















Here's my attempt at sarcasm. See the T-shirt? I'm the opposite of that. You can tell by the devil eyes and the fact that I was dancing and singing out a song as I acted out the parts. I was on vacation in San Diego and I was having lots of fun playing "Monkey on the Bed".




















Here I am in Legoland. This is one of those water fountain displays where you stand there and wait until water shoots out of the ground and soaks you. I waited patiently, and then...



















I got what I wanted...over and over and over again....




















This is me playing in the bathtub. This is the only time you'll see me with straight hair. Within a couple minutes of getting out, my naturally curly hair takes over. If you don't comb my hair quickly, within a span of about ten minutes you won't be able to comb through it without running into about a million snags.

O.K. That's all you get for now. Thanks for visiting, and I'll see you again soon I hope! Ciao!